PERIOD OF GESTATION |
Days were dark, friends were few, my world was caving in, clouds of depression looming over.
I thought it was over, that I was done. I imagined the warm rays of sunlight would never again caress my soul. All I had was a shell, a shell now covered in goosebumps...
Like a short sighted mortal, I didn't realize what I had thought a tomb was only a womb.
What I had imagined a burial, was only a period of gestation.
I didn't realize I was a seed planted, a seed awaiting a season of harvest, planted because God does not work in public, He works private, true to the formula of "from the inside-out".
I didn't want to compete as I thought I was complete.
I was a David now without a Goliath, the numbness of mediocrity threatening to cripple me.
I had constantly been chasing, chasing what I thought I would become, not realizing I already was, being an acorn at the time, did not mean I was never an oak tree.
PRODUCT OF REFINEMENT |
I went about life wanting to be a product of refinement but did not comprehend that refiners gold first goes through the fiery furnace.
That the finest flour goes through degrees and levels of grounding.
That the finest fragrance comes from crushed seeds.
Simply put, my pain was not in vain because exceptionalism can not be produced from normalcy.
I needed to experience exceptional pain to have exceptional power.
God's strength had to be justified in my weakness.
Like an arrow, I have been pulled back, farther and farther with more resistance, but the time to spring forth has come. I am being shot forth, further than what I ever have been in my life.
Darkness no longer scares me because greatness does not germinate in public!
-I am Pam, The Nubian Goddess, An African Woman Of Substance-