The Pursuit for Consistency

CONSISTENT IN YOUR CRAFT

In the month of November I wrote an article where I mentioned; "Be consistent in your pursuit of the Lord and His Gospel" and as a result I was challenged by a friend to research and write on how one can be more consistent.

I have not done any research as that would take away from the personal approach I'd like for this article but will rather share ways I have tried in my efforts of being more consistent.

At the break of 2016, bit cliche yes, I made a resolution that I would make every effort to be positive and grateful throughout the year and life as it is, it always seems to have a negative counteract for most positive intentions. 

2016 was not an easy year, from losing loved ones to a car accident to a house break in and and and but because of my intent to stay positive, 2016 was certainly a year worthy of honor and much gratitude. This honor and gratitude stems from my conscious choice to see the good in every bad, but how was I consistent in staying grateful and positive? Because it is only human to forget, I made a vision board with all my goals, mainly character/attribute goals and seeing this board each morning reminded and continues to remind me of the person I'd like to become and how I'd like to achieve that, further more, I got myself a Gratitude Jar, at the end of each day, on a little piece of paper I would write down what I was grateful for in that day.

VISION BOARD

GRATITUDE JAR

Having mentioned the above, it also my belief that in order to be successful in your pursuit for consistency, one needs to have found themselves and comfortable on the journey they are on, in a nutshell, one needs to be authentic. You simply cannot find consistency whilst following crowds and their motions, You need to be at peace with where you are, what has been meted to you as well as where your journey leads. You need to be consistent in your pursuit for consistency.

CONSISTENTLY AUTHENTIC

To refer back to the article I mentioned in the beginning, I had made an example in it on how I had strived to stay consistent with my gym routines and attendance and this friend mentioned in her comment that if you can do it with gym, surely this principle is doable and can be applied across other avenues of life. I am one that gets bored quickly and to counteract this, I live by goals and setting pinnacles for myself but in so speaking I get a little impatient with long term goals. I'm a complex one aren't I? But then again don't they always say that success comes with daily repeated exercises? Do you not see this as being consistent?

Because I get bored quickly but also get impatient with long term goals, I often map my life, I look at my long term goals, consider the milestones which need to be reached to achieve these goals then break them into shorter, more practical and achievable goals. But then again, this system works for me and what works for me, might not work for another. You have been enabled with enough power to discover for yourself what works for you. Apart from the obvious definition, consistency is also defined as "the way in which a substance holds together; thickness or viscosity". My consistency in my gym routine eventually leads to a firmer, well constructed body. This is also the result in other avenues of life when applied correctly. My consistent efforts in staying grateful and positive in 2016 have led me to being a much happier and content person who is in a sense awakened to her destiny.

GROWTH & BEAUTY IN CONSISTENCY

It's not what we do once in a while that shapes our lives but rather what we do consistently and in the same light keep in mind that, if you are persistent you will get it, but if you are consistent you will keep it...

Conference with D Todd. Christofferson _ My Notes

PROPHETS OF THE LORD

Last night, 17/11/2016, the Centurion and Pretoria Stakes of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints had the honored privilege of being addressed by members of the Seventy and Quorum of the Twelve Apostles. What a blessing and honor it was to be there...

Just yesterday I wrote an article about being true to yourself and having no fear in gladly sharing your truth. In sharing my thoughts on last night's conference, I'll first start of by saying it's been a few weeks since I last went to Church and in deciding to attend last night's meeting it felt as though I first had to choose between going or attending gym instead. Nevertheless, I searched deep within myself and found a strong conviction to go, an undoubted desire to be there, not to socialize or meet new faces but to hear what message the Lord had for me through His Apostles

Those that know me well might be in awe from my last paragraph considering how strong a Christian I am and how strongly I feel about my Religion but we all have ups and downs along the way and it is only through being true to myself and acknowledging my weaknesses, will I be enabled to turn these weaknesses into my strengths.

Going back to the conference and my thoughts, we were addressed by Elder Soares and his wife, as well as Elder D. Todd Christofferson and his wife.

ELDER ULISSES SOARES _ MEMBER OF THE SEVENTY

As the first speaker at this special conference, Elder Soares started off by emphasizing the importance of a Prophet in our day as well as the added importance in having faith in the Lord's appointed Prophet. He noted that Faith is the first principle of the Gospel and in a world that has today lost it's identity and moral values, it ever more critical that we look up to the Prophet for his teachings, this for a promise of a safer life and promise for eternal life.

He reiterated notes from a talk he had read about the Sabbath day and how it is a day of gratitude and love. Being a native of Brazil, he shared a story of when him and his wife visited USA and how on a Sabbath day they had decided to go to Church instead of pay an occasional visit to an amusement park. He shared how at this particular ward they had visited, they met a couple that had recognized their accent and therefore invited them into their home for lunch as the husband had served a mission in Brazil. Later that night Sister Soares had a miscarriage and the first person to turn to was the same brother that had invited them into their home. His words were, "Was it a coincidence that this Portuguese speaking brother was a Gynecologist and the Bishop, a doctor at the hospital which was just a few blocks from our hotel?" It certainly was not and the Lord had indeed directed them to that Ward. Do what is needed of you and the Lord will take care of the rest.

He closed off by saying, "Elevating the spirit of the Sabbath is the greatest service that we can bring into our homes."

SISTER ROSANA SOARES - WIFE TO ELDER SOARES

At the conclusion of her husband's talk, Sister Soares started off by sharing a conversation she had  had with another individual and how this individual had said, "I'm a good person and serve my fellow men, why do I need the Church?" She mentioned she had never thought she would come across such a question.

In response to this she shared her thoughts and that first and foremost, the Church is the Church of Christ and not the invention of men. That hardships and suffering are no excuse to lose your faith, one should always stay consistent. Her message spoke to me, that inasmuch as we might come across encounters with our fellow members at church it is really no excuse, the Church is the Church of Christ and that is who your focus should be on. She stated she feels the Gospel is what aided her in raising and steering her family in the right direction.

She closed off by saying. "I need Jesus Christ in my life, He is my greatest light. When I am weak, I turn to Him to draw from His strength. He does not reject even the greatest sinner. We need the Church and the Gospel."

SISTER KATHERINE CHRISTOFFERSON - WIFE TO ELDER CHRISTOFFERSON

Sister Katherine's talk was a short one and more of her testimony on the Book of Mormon.
What stood out the most for me was her shared story on the exercise of reading the Book of Mormon in your home and with your family.

She mentioned her two sons were constantly and most times at each other and how she had once heard that reading the BOM can eliminate contention in your home. She notes she decided to try this exercise as her last resort and was at awe at how this brought love and value into their home.

ELDER D. TODD CHRISTOFFERSON - MEMBER OF THE QUORUM OF THE TWELVE APOSTLES

What an honor to have met him, listen to him speak and chuckle at his jokes.
 Elder D. Todd Christofferson presided at our meeting and as such had the honor of closing our meeting with his remarks.

He mentioned in his talk he would reiterate what had been said by Elder and Sister Soares as well as his wife, Sister Christofferson. He started off by saying he is grateful for Elder and Sister Soares as they are perfect and genuine examples of what they teach. This had me thinking that how often are we perfect doers of our beliefs? He went on to encourage us that we should stay consistent and persistent in our pursuit in and of the Gospel, I made a note to myself that inasmuch as I am consistent with gym and my goals, why can't I do the same in my beliefs and religion? Surely it's possible...

In reiterating his wife's talk, he said in their daily BOM exercise, he and his family came to learn and recognize the voice of the Spirit and the Lord, he said the scriptures became theirs and their children's friend and that the greatest blessing we could bring into our homes would be the Scriptures.

In his talk he mentioned how the Church is for all but will always put emphasis on "The One" and the "Lost Sheep". He mentioned each of us are needed in the Gospel and can contribute. He referred to the Parable of Talents and how the Lord will always add onto whatever you have whether big or small. He said we need to stop comparing ourselves as the Lord counts the desire the same as He does the act, "I give not because I have not, but if I had, I would give".

He referred to the Atonement as more than just an act of forgiveness but also an enabler of the Plan of Salvation and cleanser to enter into the presence of the Lord. He reminded us that the Lord is an active Leader of His Church and that we should have faith and allow our faith to grow.

In closing he said, "I bless you to have the Holy Ghost in your homes and individual lives and to allow the Holy Ghost to reign, I also bless you to have and attain joy."

Words spoken last night have left me with peace in my soul, they have left me reassured that we are indeed led by an ordained Prophet and Apostles. They have reminded me that I matter and inasmuch as I need the Church, the Church needs me too...

I am a Mormon, I dare to stand alone, I dare to have a purpose firm and I dare to make it known!

At a Crossroads...

CROSSROADS...

How often in life do we find ourselves at a crossroads?

Why is it that you will almost always find yourself alone at a crossroads?

In her song "Listen", Beyonce said;

 "Listen, I am alone at a crossroads

I'm not at home in my own home

And I've tried and tried

To say what's on my mind

You should have known
Now I'm done believing you
You don't know what I'm feeling
I'm more than what
You've made of me
I followed the voice, you gave to me
But now I've gotta find my own"

You reach a stage in your life where unlike Beyonce said, "I'm not at home in my own home", that you should in fact always be in your home. Home to me resonates my state of mind, my place of comfort and surety and my standing and unwavering opinion of things.

A time should come where you no longer have to question whether you should or shouldn't say what's on your mind and honestly so.

I questioned earlier why it is that we are almost always alone at a crossroads and that is purely because it is your life and yours alone, your path and your's alone to take. So in making decisions and choices which will impact your life, why is it that you constantly seek to get another's opinion or even seek validation for your own opinions?

Beyonce cries out that she has tried and tried to say what's on her mind and that " you should have known..." but this "you" she refers to, I choose to see it as a conversation with her inner self. You should have known better, You should have stood your ground, You should stood and spoke for what you really believe in, You should have been You... but now you realize you have always gone with the crowds, the crowds and their motions became yours and their your beliefs your beliefs too, you lost your voice, your standing maybe even your identity but inherited theirs...

The beauty of life is that there is recreation in everything, it's never over until it's really over.
Beyonce says, "I followed the voice you gave to me but now I've gotta find my own"... When Heavenly Father created you, He enabled every fiber of your being, He enabled you to stand strong on your own and do anything and everything that you set out to do. He enabled you to be on earth but not of the earth, why do you then succumb? Why do you allow them to define you and even take from you? Make choices for you and make you believe the complete opposite from speaking your mind and liberating yourself?

You need to do move from "I probably shouldn't say that" to "I'll respectfully speak my mind whether it gains me friends or not." I always reiterate the famous phrase of "Those that matter won't mind and those that mind don't matter."

You are alone at this crossroads and forever shall you be, whether you go left or right is your choice but do it because you want to and not because you have been told to. Be honest and true to yourself and emotions, it is the most liberating of achievements. I say achievement because although easy to say it is seldom easy to do. Be in the world but not of the world...

If at this crossroads you are not sure whether to go left or right, there is nothing wrong staying right where you are until you figure it out, if you are not sure whether to say it or not, there is nothing wrong in saying nothing at all until you know how or when to say it.

Be true to yourself and identity... Alone you came, Alone shall you depart!

BE

LIBERATED

When You've Found It...

I'm certain once in one's lifetime, the question has been asked, "How and when will I know that this love is true, genuine and real?" 

From experience, it is a question which cannot be answered by even the most theoretically, educated and complex explanation. It is a question which is most times met with unsatisfying answers. Truth is, no one else but you can answer this question for yourself. Love is the same but different for all.

At a time in my life, I was fortunate enough to experience what I felt was true love for me and I'll share these experiences with you.

As a grown woman I have been in a few relationships and as imaginable all these relationships have been different and special in their unique rights but the relationship I will share with you is one which has set a benchmark so high that I refuse to let go of these standards.

In this relationship I was exposed to a love so pure that I never had to feel as though I was not good enough, as though I had to be a certain someone, carry a certain title or even look or speak a certain way to be accepted and loved perfectly. I was taken as I am, nothing was subtracted from my being but instead so much more good was added. #1 Love should not take from you but instead it should add onto and better what you already have.

In this relationship it did not matter what or how many arguments we had but a day would never pass without us making peace and moving on. A previous argument was never brought into a new one, grudges were things we knew nothing of. An argument was never personal, the one was never shamed, criticized nor belittled in the process. #2 Love does not belittle or cause harm.

I was awakened to a love that didn't require fancy outings and gifts to be beautiful and exciting. When they happened they were great but they were not the core elements which made the relationship. Simple acts of kindness, respect, loyalty, complimentary utterances were what made us. #3 Love should be based on the Subject and not the Objects.

Often most females desire this quality in their partners but only a few receive it. Close attention to detail. You want your partner to know and understand every facet of you. Strange enough I didn't go looking for this quality but received so much of it. Little things like the changed color of my lipstick I'd get told, "Something is different, did you change your lipstick?" and bingo! "You smell different, did you change your perfume?" and bingo! Some females will change their hairstyles completely and their partners will not even notice. #4 Love is patient enough to know fully and understand its partakers/participants.

Without numbering any further, through this relationship I was awakened to the fact that true love does not diminish with time, true love is stronger today than what it was yesterday. True love is liberating and exciting. True love is not a burden but constantly seeks to serve and appreciate. True love ages with the years and like wine it truly truly gets better and better. This kind of love does not seek to cheat, it is not interested in such time wasting, heart wrenching frivolities. True love is single-eyed and one-minded.

True love is TIMELESS... If you have not found this kind of love, trust me, it is worth waiting for!

Annual Remembrance Of My Existence

Reflection & Appreciation

Once a year every year, we all unavoidably get reminded of the day we were born and often this day is met with great enthusiasm as well as tons of expectations from ourselves to those around us. We expect to be celebrated and showered with messages, calls, gifts etc. at times we go as far as expect surprise getaways and parties or even plan our own.

While there is nothing wrong with this and being celebrated, have you taken the time to celebrate yourself? I mean taken the time to do some deep, honest and truthful introspection? To awe at the milestones you have overcome and conquered? The person you have become today?

While it's purely human to have expectations this can often lead to many disappointments, disappointments which might even be hard to fathom because, hello! it's my birthday, how could so and so not do such and such???? But then I say, why should so and so do such and such when you haven't done it for yourself when you actually can? I'm sure you get my point.

While it's okay to get celebrated, it is far more important to celebrate yourself!! The world will more fully celebrate a self-celebrated monument.

Self-Celebrated Monument

The beauty of being a self celebrated monument is that you are able to celebrate others even when it isn't their day or any special occasion.

This year particularly, I don't know why, maybe I'm growing up?? But I felt a deep sense of gratitude towards my parents, particularly my mom, the main reason that I am here today and celebrated. Had it not been for them, there would be nothing for those around me to celebrate today. Had it not been for my mom, her role and teachings, I would not be who and where I am today.

She is a self-celebrated monument that has celebrated me all the years of her life and my life will live on to celebrate hers all the days of my life.

New Year, New Leap, New Leaf

My annual remembrances serve as anniversaries which drive me to turning new leafs and planning new leaps. It is a time for me to reflect over all I have overcome and achieved in the past year and a time for me to plan and set out my pinnacles for the year to come.

As the years add on, I like to view myself as a barrel bearing precious goods, a barrel which should only bear fruitful gifts when the time has come and obviously this can only be achieved if I add good elements to this barrel. 

It is my journey and not a race, it is my path to take and my lessons to learn. I came alone and alone shall I return. I am celebrated because I have celebrated myself..

I am a Self-Celebrated Monument 

A Life Worth Living

Have You Taken a Minute to Reflect, to Find Yourself?

I reckon the most profound and thought provoking question humanity has managed to come up with is, What Makes Life Worth Living?

This is a question which isn't conducive to immediate thoughtful responses, but given a week to think about it, I doubt the answers would be any better.

There is somewhat some resistance to answering this question honestly and I think the reason people answer in such unsatisfying ways is that, we’ve grown so used to defining ourselves in terms of possessions, possessions that literally feel like extensions of ourselves, making it hard to think of even the people close to us in any way other than as possessions, as “objects” with certain qualities that make us happy. This may also go for careers, passions etc.

I deem it fit to break this question down, personalize it a bit - see it a bit as a verb and not so much as a noun. What makes your life worth living, what is the real essence of your existence, what is your main cause for getting up each morning??

I'll share with you some of the things which make my life worth living...

RELATING

CREATING 

One might wonder why I'm not saying My Family or Daughter but instead Relating and Creating. That is because my family alone is not what makes my life worth living. Sounds strange and wrong doesn't it? How can Pam say such a thing?? Well that is simply because the family alone is just an object. I mentioned earlier that we tend to objectify even the people closest to us. Well, what makes my life worth living is how I RELATE with my family on a day to day basis, the relationships I strive to CREATE and maintain with them day in and out. It's word and feelings in action, not a noun nor object.

AWAKENING TO DREAMS

A life worth living is one where you are awakened to goals, dreams, aspirations, probabilities. To me, it is a life where you are constantly searching deep within yourself and finding worth. No one finds a life worth living, one has to make life worth living. 

ENABLING AND SERVING

Personally, my passion alone is not what makes my life worth living. What I am able to achieve and enable as well as who I am able to serve with my passion is what makes it so much more worth it. A life worth living is one where I am able to help another, not out of want for a reward or recognition but because you too have once been in need and know that serving those around you is the most fulfilling feeling.

DISCOVER NEW HORIZONS

What is life without new discoveries? Adventures and explorations? New knowledge and added knowledge to what you already know? Life is more fulfilling when you are still able to learn something each day, to learn from areas and avenues you never thought you would or even could. Keep life exciting, save up, visit a place you never have before, explore, tap into your spiritual being, you'll be amazed at how powerful and profound you can be...

These are just a few of the things that make my life worth living, but model of the story is, learn to LIVE life, it's a doing word, learn to feel, learn to act, learn to explore, learn to do, learn to relate, adopt and adapt... 

A life worth living can only be defined by YOU

Lessons Learned From Mother

Parents, both mother and father have played vital roles in who we are today and what we'll teach our little ones tomorrow, these are some of my best lessons from my mom that'll stay with me to my dying day...

BE BEAUTIFUL

If there was one thing that my mother always emphasized, it was, be beautiful, stand out, take care of yourself, look after your skin, well I've always had troublesome skin so she had reason haha. A day would never go by without my mom telling me I'm beautiful and that has stayed with me. One might look at it as flattery from a parent but it was so important in building my confidence levels. In a society today where beauty is measured or even defined by designer wear, make up or hair, confidence in my image was rooted at an early age.

EQUIP YOURSELF WITH KNOWLEDGE

She has always and continues to be steadfast in this teaching and caution. I've never been one for reading or studying intensely and this frustrated my mom as she would always say, equip yourself, study as much as you can, read a book, whatever investment you make in your books and studies is guaranteed to come to fruition tomorrow. She would always use my older siblings as examples and awaken me to how learned they are and how they would read books out of interests sake. There is wealth and power in reading, I'm glad I heeded this teaching and continue to do so. It has opened so many doors, it has introduced me to my independence and continues to groom me everyday.

DISCOVER YOUR PASSION

My mom always encouraged to find a hobby or to discover a passion. I have found my passion in cooking and being creative with my meals. I'm not a chef or desire to be one but this hobby or passion of mine is somewhat so therapeutic. I often express my emotions on my plate and as such I'm constantly working at being a happy and positive person, it exudes and the world sees it too. A passion is something that effortlessly excites you, it's not tiresome nor does it come across as demanding or labor intensive. It's liberating and it fulfills.

FINANCIAL MUSCLE

She has always encouraged having a financial muscle and with that comes budgeting and self discipline. As much as the world refuses to accept today that the world evolves around money, there is the sad truth that it actually does. She has always taught that there is nothing sexier than an independent woman and even said, "instead of anticipating to be a front seat passenger in a boyfriend's car, work on being a driver in your own", "instead of working on being a tenant or roommate, work at being a home owner", "instead of waiting on an allowance, work on having your own bank balance". She went on to teach, and even when these things are acquired, never allow your life to evolve around them and never ever look down on others and while the world evolves around money, your life and happiness should not.

FAITH IN THE LORD & HIS WORKS

My mom taught me the importance of having a faith and religion to live by. She taught me the importance of Heavenly Father and living by His precepts. She never forced me to follow but simply led me by example and by such I envied what I saw in her. She taught me to always give thanks to Him as eagerly as I did when in need of something. Having a faith and belief led me to a certain lifestyle, a lifestyle which taught me laws were there to protect and not restrict, that thanksgiving gave one more fulfillment, that service increased love for others, that purity is in fact Godliness, that virtue was precious and sacred and that self worth is the best kind of worthiness.

OPEN, HONEST COMMUNICATION

It is this lesson that I will forever strive to instill in my children. My mom is my friend, before working at being a strict mom, my mom first worked at being a loving friend. She would always say, it doesn't matter what happens, it doesn't matter how it happens, you should never be afraid to come to me. At first I thought, maybe she is only saying that so I can tell her then she'll be harsh on me but I was wrong. I always tell friends that she is my "mobile journal" and confidant. From an early age she taught me, "it doesn't help you get exposed to things like dating, hide it from me, come home with a belly or blue eye when you had said you went to friends." She taught me and assured me through her actions that it's okay to confide in her, rather her than friend or stranger. It felt so good and liberating not keeping secrets or having to lie about my whereabouts, bringing a boy home so he could meet mother and see that I had been brought up well, having mother sit us down and caution and groom us. Communication between mother and child should not be judgmental, it should not be harsh, I would go to her afraid and leave with great comfort. She would be brutally honest then leave me to make my own decision in the end. I still say and some might not agree, I would rather have my daughter smoke/drink in my presence with my knowledge than do it behind my back and go to extremes. The best lessons are learned from home and can only be done when done openly and honestly...

My mom is my rock, she is my pillar and well of wisdom, she is a brave woman that stands her ground, she is a woman of courage and vigor but also as graceful as a dove, she has been challenged many a times but refuses to be defined by those challenges, blessed are those who come to meet her...

There is Light even In Darkness

Light Even In Darkness

So it's been a while since I last posted an article but mainly because quite a lot has happened in that space of time as well...

How often do you find yourself in a situation where your reaction in situations is almost always impulsive and sometimes negative too?

How often do you take the time to just think something through or even understand it before reacting or even verbally responding?

Now, two and a half weeks ago, particularly on a Friday, I got up, didn't feel like gym so I just prepared to go to the office. Upon my arrival at the office I had a bit of admin to do as I had been travelling all week but then I also had to make 2 trips to 2 of my clients. I really wasn't up to it, all I wanted to do was to stay in the office, complete my admin then jet off to start my weekend.

Regardless, I did what I had to in the office then went off to my first client in the Eastrand. That done, I proceeded off to my next client who is nestled in the Northern Suburbs of Jhb, Randburg. While driving to this next and last client, I had a few thoughts running through my mind, being a woman I was already thinking what I would make for supper, drafting a budget in my head and making financial plans and just as a quick thought I thought to myself, you know no matter how good a driver one is and how long one has been at it, at times road accidents are just inevitable and I thought, if I had to be in one in the near future, I would pretty much be screwed...

It hadn't been an hour and almost in a split second, lo and behold... I was in a car accident. What?!! Did I just have a car accident?!! Is this a dream... a continuation of my thoughts in the form of a nightmare?!! I was in utter disbelief.. Flip! What was I going to do?! Really, on a Friday afternoon??!!

As you might imagine, I was frustrated, stressed, panicked, regretful and almost bitter too but in the mist of all this there was a light in my storm, the driver of the other vehicle was so calm and seasoned and with a smile on his face said, "Lady, we should stop meeting like this," At the police station, the cops taking my report were full of jokes and managed to put a smile on my face. The very car that was bashed was still drive-able, no mechanical faults reported on my speedometer, no funny noises coming from the engine and no leaks and squeaks.

Obviously this was very hard to comprehend at first and in my view then, there was no light in this storm, what light is there when my brand new car has been bashed in less than 12 months? What light is there when I have to pay crazy amounts towards my insurance excess? But then it's almost 3 weeks now, the car is set to return tomorrow from panelbeaters and it is only now that I realize there was so much light amidst this storm. The Lord preserved my life, I made it out without a scratch or bruise, needless to say, the cars "IP" was also preserved with just minor minor damages to the body, those involved were calm and collected, heck insurance even gave me a discount on my excess :):)

I'm sharing this event with all of you, in an effort to awaken you that, in every negative there is a positive and that in every dark space there is light, in every good there is bad and sometimes all you need to do is to give yourself the time to understand or even comprehend what you're faced with. It doesn't matter what it may be, roll with the punches, take it a day at a time, a step at a time and you will begin to notice these little sparkles of light along the way.

There is indeed light in darkness and sometimes YOU might have to be that light in your own storm or another's...

Because I Am A Goddess

Because I Am A GODDESS

I am a goddess because I am daughter to a God. 

Because I'm a goddess I know my worth, I know I am destined for greatness, I know I am of honor and virtue. I know I am made of might and vigor. I know I possess many riches and wealth which cannot be bought. I know I am royalty and as such should treat myself accordingly.

This is just not applicable to me, but to you too!

With such great a knowledge, you cannot just sit and be acted upon, you get up and act. You cannot settle for mediocrity, go out and get the very best. You cannot blend in and conform, I refuse, you are a goddess, destined to stand out and lead! You are a woman of strength and wisdom.

It is my belief and opinion that one's name, in a way predestine's their character. The Urban Dictionary defines a Nubian Goddess to be "A woman that comes in a variety of shapes and sizes, does not like to be praised because of her figure i.e. full hips or buttocks, but because of her willingness to survive despite the great obstacles that might be in her way." Part of it states that, she is a woman who seeks after intellect and self sustainability, independence in a nutshell.

As a goddess, you seek to nurture and uplift.You care for the needs of those around with no expectation for a reward. A goddess is self respecting and a beacon of light. She takes great pride in her heritage and beautifies it in the process. She is not ashamed of her skin color or texture of her hair but embraces that which she has been given because she knows she is a goddess and knows she is of great value and stature regardless of these facets.

Be a goddess, Be a priestess, Be an emblem, You are of Divine Nature! Know your worth then embrace it more fully...

THAT SILVER LINING

THAT SILVER LINING...

Lately I find that my inspiration to write comes from all sorts of avenues and experiences...

Yesterday whilst driving home, I was stuck in major traffic on the highway, literally moving at about 10km/h. Bit frustrating as you end up not knowing what to do with all this idleness whilst moving at a snail pace, but with the corner of my eye, I was struck by the beauty of the clouds in the sky.

It was about 16:45pm and the clouds were just so so beautiful, they were getting dark but had this gorgeous, bright silver lining at the edges and still exuded such glorious rays. Me being me, I turned my thoughts to humanity and applied this beautiful illustration to how we do and react to things around us.

The clouds were dark, some of us if not most have a dark element and while this darkness might not necessarily refer to negativity, it's basically an illustration that we all have a past, we've all gathered experiences and treasure certain memories. Modern generation would call it "Skeletons In Your Closet". 

Looking at these clouds, however dark they might have been, they still had the gorgeous silver lining I mentioned. Back to humanity, however dark your past, soul or closet might be, you should never fail to be beautiful, to be happy, to feel worthy, to share this beauty with the world, to use your experiences and past to brighten, enlighten and uplift another's life. The good and the bad come together to make a beautiful picture. Light cannot exist without darkness. Positive cannot exist without negative.

Dark as these clouds were, there were these illuminating rays which burst from them, so bright, so broad, so beautiful. You are who you are because of your past and experiences you've had and while that might be the case, there is ALWAYS a positive in a negative. Don't be so caught up in what has gone wrong that you fail to realize what is going right. The soul knows what to do to repair itself, you only need to condition the mind.

Going back to that silver lining, I mean looking at the picture as well, I view the lining as a shield and armor as well. It's a protective vest which has embodied what's within, and while that might be the case, it shines so boldly that one would think anything unwanted will either bounce off it or burn/melt. Don't you think that is how we should be? Beautiful, Bright and Bold but Brave too? Add assertive to it, you're in the world but not of the world, you see things happening around you but what doesn't suit you shouldn't change and affect you? 

But then again, this was just me sharing all the thoughts I had from the glimpse I captured with the corner of eye, this world is beautiful, be beautiful too!!

UNREQUITED LOVE...

Unrequited love..., what is unrequited love? So many of us suffer from this one-sided love, be it in a friendship, companionship, relationship, marriage. But why???

We sometimes come across situations where we find ourselves feeling as though we're constantly giving but what we're giving isn't reciprocated. This goes both for men and women but being a woman, I'll speak from a woman's perspective. 

As a woman, it's natural to instantly wonder and assume, no matter your level of confidence, is he not into me? Am I not what he needs? Why does it feel like I'm forcing him to be with me? Why should I always make the first move? Worse, is there someone else? Is that why he's distant or almost unavailable to me? While it might be advisable to give 100% even when your partner gives 50%, sometimes this takes from you, to a point where you even lose yourself. A partnership is between 2 people and both individuals should give of themselves for the success of that partnership.

In situations where you feel you're love or efforts aren't reciprocated, you need to ask yourself, have I done all that I could've and should've as a partner? If the answer is yes then the next best thing to do is to approach your partner. Communication and brutal honesty is so vital, you cannot live by assumptions and make misinformed conclusions. 

Learn to know and understand your partner, are things the way they are because maybe indeed this is not what he wants? Can we change it or do we accept and move on? Could there be things he is hiding from you which is preventing him from showing all his affection (other spouses)? Or maybe just maybe the poor guy isn't aware of all your expectations and would willingly meet them had you disclosed these to him? Again, all these unanswered questions can only be answered through open and honest communication. Don't be that girl or guy who is single but in a relationship.

Problems can be fixed, but unrequited love is a tragedy and a curse of a lonely heart, you shouldn't have to suffer from unrequited love... You are better, you deserve better, go out and get it!

I Thought I Heard... Did I Hear Right... Does it Even Matter?!

 

Many a times we come across situations in life where we hear things which have been said about us, sometimes these rumors even come with the author's name... my question to you is, so what??!

If you are living your life the way you want to and are happy with your achievements or wherever you might be or even going in life, what does it matter what others have to say about you? Is it their life? No! Is it their problems? No! Are they travelling the same journey as you? No! Do they know the ins and outs? Again, No! So, what does it matter?

I always say that rumors and gossip is the devil's radio and while you might not want to feature on this station, you should not be a broadcaster either. If others have made your business their business, it simply stops being your business! It is none of your business, stay out of it, you have your life to live. Everyone is entitled to an opinion, and while that entitlement might exist it does not define you.

I remember back in the day I would hear my name from this one and this one and this one's mouth and this would hurt me and I would go home and sulk over it. It stole my happiness and rewarded me with grief and misery, but why? Did it mean all those rumors were true and truly defined who I am? Well, if they are true and they hurt you, then don't you think it's time you changed? But if they are not, why do they bother you? Hold your peace, keep your head held high and allow your actions and success to do all the talking for you... This way your dignity would've been preserved and protected...

There is a quote that says, "There is no way to be completely happy without being oblivious to the world around you."

These Are a Few of  My Favorite Looks...

I've been asked several times to blog on my clothing style and fashion sense, so here goes...

Royal Blue and White on a Casual Day to the Office

It is said that when you look good you feel good, denim wear doesn't have to be entirely simple, you can add a bit of sophistication with a formal blazer/jacket and a pop of color on those lips!

Grey and Black for a Chilly Day, bit of Leather to add some Fun
You can take a party dress and add some class with a long coat of your choice, stockings and most girl's favorite, heels. Play with that hair as well, so many choices and options...

Bit of Silk, So Beautiful, So Girly

Bit of silk to tap into your femininity, bit of bling to excite the woman in you and bows on heels to bring out the inner teen...

Lady In Red... 

How you present yourself will determine how others receive you. Red makes a statement all on its own, no words needed. The chignon(hairstyle) says I'm a lady, I've got class, those heels with a bow, say "Hey, I'm playful too!"

Black is Colorful... but can't leave my Brown Behind

It has been said that people that love all black clothing usually have very colorful lives. But have you ever thought of wearing a dark color with another dark color? Well Brown is my favorite color so why not...?!

Wiz Khalifa said... "Black and Yellow!"

It was a cold day, it was gloomy too but my outfit certainly didn't have to follow suit. Bright yellow Chinese collar coat with a twinge of black to add some elegance. You can wear that hair down to make it less formal or tie it up into a neat bun for that Wall Street look... I like my Wall Street look hehe :)

Where's my Whip... Where's that Horse???

A classy but urban horse riding look, cowgirl wouldn't do would it? More like Polo, Equestrian right?? Anyway I used my favorite colors and textures for this look, rich brown leather boots, thick fawn stretchy leggings and a royal blue light chiffon blouse, bit of casual, bit of formal but oh so Gorg!




Dress the way you want to be addressed...! Formal doesn't have to be boring and Casual doesn't have to be oh so simple!!

MOTHERHOOD...

MY GREATEST CALLING...

YET!!

As a young girl, I envisioned myself to one being a wife and a mother. I had dreams of having a little one who would be just like me and love the things that I love.

When I first found out I was expectant, I was overcome with both feelings of excitement and fear of the unknown. Was I, Pam, going to be a mother?! What kind of child would I bear?! Who would she/he look like?! What kind of mother was I going to be?! Did Heavenly Father deem me so worthy to groom one of His spirit children?! My Oh My... what had I gotten myself into??!

While these kinds of feelings and thoughts raced through me day in and out, I was each time overwhelmed with great feelings of love, love so great for someone I had never met...
The months went by and each passing day seemed to never end. I was so excited, I wanted to meet my little person, I wanted to hold her, kiss her, glare and stare and tell her how much I loved her...

The day came, I panicked, was I ready? Could I go through with this? The Pain?? I've heard so many stories... what would mine be?? Heavenly Father had called me to such a great calling, surely He would help me through it...

Finally, after 12 hours, there she was, so beautiful and so bright, so worthy of all the pain endured. So pure a soul, entrusted in my care. I vowed to love her no matter what, to always be by her side, a mother was also born on this day, I didn't know how but I vowed to be the best mom I could possibly be...

It's been 21 months of love, joy, laughter, giggles, reprimands here and there, nappies and night feeds, pampering and soothing, chasing and catching. Life has not been the same, my heart has unlocked feelings I never knew existed. Indeed Motherhood, is my greatest calling yet... No longer do I live for myself but there is now a being that looks up to me and walks in my footsteps... at times literally haha

Her smile lights my world, her sweet "work in progress" vocabulary is melodious, her touch so smooth, her kisses filled with so much drool and her love so liberating... I carry the title of "Mommy" with pride and wear the arms of my daughter as precious jewels around my neck...

I am a Mother, I have been called to a great Calling!!