Bed of Roses

Whilst listening to Bon Jovi's "Bed of Roses", my attention was captured by a certain phrase, "For tonight I sleep on a bed of nails".

This had me thinking and being my inquisitive self, I found myself asking, why nails? Were they a mere metaphor for something else? but for what and why? I certainly couldn't come up with answers for these questions but for a second thought, how many nails do we create and gather for ourselves? How many uncomfortable situations do we create? How many uncomfortable situations do we linger in and entertain? Why? Why do we create room for it?

A close friend of mine sent me a message this morning which mentioned how we have become victims of a notion which dictates we are not in control of our emotions. "I lost my temper", "He made me angry", "But I can't help it". Whilst reading this I was reminded of a phrase from one of our older Church Prophets, Brigham Young who said, "He who takes offense when offense is intended is a fool but he who takes offense when none is intended is an even bigger fool".

Why lie on this bed of nails when you can choose to lie on a bed of roses? Why allow things to get to you when they can glide off like water off a duck's back? Why hold on to this jagged knife which keeps cutting you when you can release and let go? Why drown under deep waters when you can rise above them and exhale? Do you feel you do not have the power and capacity to do so?

Exhale the negativity, let go of the pessimism, the belief that you cannot and therefore you will not. Exhale the desperate need to belong, what has gone wrong and what has not gone right, Exhale the doubt, the notion that you have not been enabled to achieve and control yourself and alter ego.

Learn to inhale, to inhale positivity, the optimism that anything is possible and achievable. Inhale the agency provided to choose for oneself. Inhale the sprinkles of sunshine and hope. Inhale life, take a deep breath and feel as life fills your lungs and broadens your horizons. Open yourself up to possibility and risks, take chances, leaps of faith and gallops of happiness. Create your own bed of roses, there will be thorns and some might sting, but they are ever so worth it. The good and the bad come together to form a beautiful picture.

Inhale calm, Exhale stress, Inhale the future, Exhale the past...

-I am Pam, the Nubian Goddess, a Woman of Substance-

Love... 21st Century Myth?

MYTHICAL ART 

Whilst browsing through my social media feed a while ago, I came across a post which read, "Real love, a 21st Century Myth".  Not knowing at the time how the publisher intended for the reader to perceive this post, it triggered a few thoughts in me...

Love and Myth... could this be joined together in one sentence? Was the significance of love depreciated to a mere myth? But then I asked myself, could it be that I am undermining the meaning and depth of the definition of "myth"...? What is a myth anyway? Well according to Google a myth is depicted as a traditional story, especially one concerning the early history of a people or explaining a natural or social phenomenon, typically involving supernatural beings or events. How wrongly and lightly had I judged "myth"? Is love not a natural phenomenon? Are we not all supernal beings?

MYTHICAL UNCONVENTIONAL LOVE

If you're a fan of Game of Thrones you will understand what was happening in the picture above, the characters backgrounds as well as the meaning of my caption for this picture. Khaleesi was taken and sold to Khal Drogo in marriage for power but because love is love and we are a supernal people of love, love becomes a natural phenomenon, natural in the sense that no one can ever teach you how to love, who to love and when to love.

Love comes to you when you least expect or want it, it comes to you in faces you never imagined or places you ever comprehended. It is mythical and majestic, it ignites in you feelings you never thought existed. It takes you and carries you... how you land, how you embrace, is entirely up to you.

The 21st Century has taught "good things come to those that get up and chase them", contrary to the original "good things come to those that wait" but it is not so with love, it is expedient that one waits on love, that one loves themselves perfectly before offering themselves to love another.

Love is what you make of it, Your Myth... Your Fairytale!

The Pursuit for Consistency

CONSISTENT IN YOUR CRAFT

In the month of November I wrote an article where I mentioned; "Be consistent in your pursuit of the Lord and His Gospel" and as a result I was challenged by a friend to research and write on how one can be more consistent.

I have not done any research as that would take away from the personal approach I'd like for this article but will rather share ways I have tried in my efforts of being more consistent.

At the break of 2016, bit cliche yes, I made a resolution that I would make every effort to be positive and grateful throughout the year and life as it is, it always seems to have a negative counteract for most positive intentions. 

2016 was not an easy year, from losing loved ones to a car accident to a house break in and and and but because of my intent to stay positive, 2016 was certainly a year worthy of honor and much gratitude. This honor and gratitude stems from my conscious choice to see the good in every bad, but how was I consistent in staying grateful and positive? Because it is only human to forget, I made a vision board with all my goals, mainly character/attribute goals and seeing this board each morning reminded and continues to remind me of the person I'd like to become and how I'd like to achieve that, further more, I got myself a Gratitude Jar, at the end of each day, on a little piece of paper I would write down what I was grateful for in that day.

VISION BOARD

GRATITUDE JAR

Having mentioned the above, it also my belief that in order to be successful in your pursuit for consistency, one needs to have found themselves and comfortable on the journey they are on, in a nutshell, one needs to be authentic. You simply cannot find consistency whilst following crowds and their motions, You need to be at peace with where you are, what has been meted to you as well as where your journey leads. You need to be consistent in your pursuit for consistency.

CONSISTENTLY AUTHENTIC

To refer back to the article I mentioned in the beginning, I had made an example in it on how I had strived to stay consistent with my gym routines and attendance and this friend mentioned in her comment that if you can do it with gym, surely this principle is doable and can be applied across other avenues of life. I am one that gets bored quickly and to counteract this, I live by goals and setting pinnacles for myself but in so speaking I get a little impatient with long term goals. I'm a complex one aren't I? But then again don't they always say that success comes with daily repeated exercises? Do you not see this as being consistent?

Because I get bored quickly but also get impatient with long term goals, I often map my life, I look at my long term goals, consider the milestones which need to be reached to achieve these goals then break them into shorter, more practical and achievable goals. But then again, this system works for me and what works for me, might not work for another. You have been enabled with enough power to discover for yourself what works for you. Apart from the obvious definition, consistency is also defined as "the way in which a substance holds together; thickness or viscosity". My consistency in my gym routine eventually leads to a firmer, well constructed body. This is also the result in other avenues of life when applied correctly. My consistent efforts in staying grateful and positive in 2016 have led me to being a much happier and content person who is in a sense awakened to her destiny.

GROWTH & BEAUTY IN CONSISTENCY

It's not what we do once in a while that shapes our lives but rather what we do consistently and in the same light keep in mind that, if you are persistent you will get it, but if you are consistent you will keep it...

Conference with D Todd. Christofferson _ My Notes

PROPHETS OF THE LORD

Last night, 17/11/2016, the Centurion and Pretoria Stakes of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints had the honored privilege of being addressed by members of the Seventy and Quorum of the Twelve Apostles. What a blessing and honor it was to be there...

Just yesterday I wrote an article about being true to yourself and having no fear in gladly sharing your truth. In sharing my thoughts on last night's conference, I'll first start of by saying it's been a few weeks since I last went to Church and in deciding to attend last night's meeting it felt as though I first had to choose between going or attending gym instead. Nevertheless, I searched deep within myself and found a strong conviction to go, an undoubted desire to be there, not to socialize or meet new faces but to hear what message the Lord had for me through His Apostles

Those that know me well might be in awe from my last paragraph considering how strong a Christian I am and how strongly I feel about my Religion but we all have ups and downs along the way and it is only through being true to myself and acknowledging my weaknesses, will I be enabled to turn these weaknesses into my strengths.

Going back to the conference and my thoughts, we were addressed by Elder Soares and his wife, as well as Elder D. Todd Christofferson and his wife.

ELDER ULISSES SOARES _ MEMBER OF THE SEVENTY

As the first speaker at this special conference, Elder Soares started off by emphasizing the importance of a Prophet in our day as well as the added importance in having faith in the Lord's appointed Prophet. He noted that Faith is the first principle of the Gospel and in a world that has today lost it's identity and moral values, it ever more critical that we look up to the Prophet for his teachings, this for a promise of a safer life and promise for eternal life.

He reiterated notes from a talk he had read about the Sabbath day and how it is a day of gratitude and love. Being a native of Brazil, he shared a story of when him and his wife visited USA and how on a Sabbath day they had decided to go to Church instead of pay an occasional visit to an amusement park. He shared how at this particular ward they had visited, they met a couple that had recognized their accent and therefore invited them into their home for lunch as the husband had served a mission in Brazil. Later that night Sister Soares had a miscarriage and the first person to turn to was the same brother that had invited them into their home. His words were, "Was it a coincidence that this Portuguese speaking brother was a Gynecologist and the Bishop, a doctor at the hospital which was just a few blocks from our hotel?" It certainly was not and the Lord had indeed directed them to that Ward. Do what is needed of you and the Lord will take care of the rest.

He closed off by saying, "Elevating the spirit of the Sabbath is the greatest service that we can bring into our homes."

SISTER ROSANA SOARES - WIFE TO ELDER SOARES

At the conclusion of her husband's talk, Sister Soares started off by sharing a conversation she had  had with another individual and how this individual had said, "I'm a good person and serve my fellow men, why do I need the Church?" She mentioned she had never thought she would come across such a question.

In response to this she shared her thoughts and that first and foremost, the Church is the Church of Christ and not the invention of men. That hardships and suffering are no excuse to lose your faith, one should always stay consistent. Her message spoke to me, that inasmuch as we might come across encounters with our fellow members at church it is really no excuse, the Church is the Church of Christ and that is who your focus should be on. She stated she feels the Gospel is what aided her in raising and steering her family in the right direction.

She closed off by saying. "I need Jesus Christ in my life, He is my greatest light. When I am weak, I turn to Him to draw from His strength. He does not reject even the greatest sinner. We need the Church and the Gospel."

SISTER KATHERINE CHRISTOFFERSON - WIFE TO ELDER CHRISTOFFERSON

Sister Katherine's talk was a short one and more of her testimony on the Book of Mormon.
What stood out the most for me was her shared story on the exercise of reading the Book of Mormon in your home and with your family.

She mentioned her two sons were constantly and most times at each other and how she had once heard that reading the BOM can eliminate contention in your home. She notes she decided to try this exercise as her last resort and was at awe at how this brought love and value into their home.

ELDER D. TODD CHRISTOFFERSON - MEMBER OF THE QUORUM OF THE TWELVE APOSTLES

What an honor to have met him, listen to him speak and chuckle at his jokes.
 Elder D. Todd Christofferson presided at our meeting and as such had the honor of closing our meeting with his remarks.

He mentioned in his talk he would reiterate what had been said by Elder and Sister Soares as well as his wife, Sister Christofferson. He started off by saying he is grateful for Elder and Sister Soares as they are perfect and genuine examples of what they teach. This had me thinking that how often are we perfect doers of our beliefs? He went on to encourage us that we should stay consistent and persistent in our pursuit in and of the Gospel, I made a note to myself that inasmuch as I am consistent with gym and my goals, why can't I do the same in my beliefs and religion? Surely it's possible...

In reiterating his wife's talk, he said in their daily BOM exercise, he and his family came to learn and recognize the voice of the Spirit and the Lord, he said the scriptures became theirs and their children's friend and that the greatest blessing we could bring into our homes would be the Scriptures.

In his talk he mentioned how the Church is for all but will always put emphasis on "The One" and the "Lost Sheep". He mentioned each of us are needed in the Gospel and can contribute. He referred to the Parable of Talents and how the Lord will always add onto whatever you have whether big or small. He said we need to stop comparing ourselves as the Lord counts the desire the same as He does the act, "I give not because I have not, but if I had, I would give".

He referred to the Atonement as more than just an act of forgiveness but also an enabler of the Plan of Salvation and cleanser to enter into the presence of the Lord. He reminded us that the Lord is an active Leader of His Church and that we should have faith and allow our faith to grow.

In closing he said, "I bless you to have the Holy Ghost in your homes and individual lives and to allow the Holy Ghost to reign, I also bless you to have and attain joy."

Words spoken last night have left me with peace in my soul, they have left me reassured that we are indeed led by an ordained Prophet and Apostles. They have reminded me that I matter and inasmuch as I need the Church, the Church needs me too...

I am a Mormon, I dare to stand alone, I dare to have a purpose firm and I dare to make it known!

At a Crossroads...

CROSSROADS...

How often in life do we find ourselves at a crossroads?

Why is it that you will almost always find yourself alone at a crossroads?

In her song "Listen", Beyonce said;

 "Listen, I am alone at a crossroads

I'm not at home in my own home

And I've tried and tried

To say what's on my mind

You should have known
Now I'm done believing you
You don't know what I'm feeling
I'm more than what
You've made of me
I followed the voice, you gave to me
But now I've gotta find my own"

You reach a stage in your life where unlike Beyonce said, "I'm not at home in my own home", that you should in fact always be in your home. Home to me resonates my state of mind, my place of comfort and surety and my standing and unwavering opinion of things.

A time should come where you no longer have to question whether you should or shouldn't say what's on your mind and honestly so.

I questioned earlier why it is that we are almost always alone at a crossroads and that is purely because it is your life and yours alone, your path and your's alone to take. So in making decisions and choices which will impact your life, why is it that you constantly seek to get another's opinion or even seek validation for your own opinions?

Beyonce cries out that she has tried and tried to say what's on her mind and that " you should have known..." but this "you" she refers to, I choose to see it as a conversation with her inner self. You should have known better, You should have stood your ground, You should stood and spoke for what you really believe in, You should have been You... but now you realize you have always gone with the crowds, the crowds and their motions became yours and their your beliefs your beliefs too, you lost your voice, your standing maybe even your identity but inherited theirs...

The beauty of life is that there is recreation in everything, it's never over until it's really over.
Beyonce says, "I followed the voice you gave to me but now I've gotta find my own"... When Heavenly Father created you, He enabled every fiber of your being, He enabled you to stand strong on your own and do anything and everything that you set out to do. He enabled you to be on earth but not of the earth, why do you then succumb? Why do you allow them to define you and even take from you? Make choices for you and make you believe the complete opposite from speaking your mind and liberating yourself?

You need to do move from "I probably shouldn't say that" to "I'll respectfully speak my mind whether it gains me friends or not." I always reiterate the famous phrase of "Those that matter won't mind and those that mind don't matter."

You are alone at this crossroads and forever shall you be, whether you go left or right is your choice but do it because you want to and not because you have been told to. Be honest and true to yourself and emotions, it is the most liberating of achievements. I say achievement because although easy to say it is seldom easy to do. Be in the world but not of the world...

If at this crossroads you are not sure whether to go left or right, there is nothing wrong staying right where you are until you figure it out, if you are not sure whether to say it or not, there is nothing wrong in saying nothing at all until you know how or when to say it.

Be true to yourself and identity... Alone you came, Alone shall you depart!

BE

LIBERATED

When You've Found It...

I'm certain once in one's lifetime, the question has been asked, "How and when will I know that this love is true, genuine and real?" 

From experience, it is a question which cannot be answered by even the most theoretically, educated and complex explanation. It is a question which is most times met with unsatisfying answers. Truth is, no one else but you can answer this question for yourself. Love is the same but different for all.

At a time in my life, I was fortunate enough to experience what I felt was true love for me and I'll share these experiences with you.

As a grown woman I have been in a few relationships and as imaginable all these relationships have been different and special in their unique rights but the relationship I will share with you is one which has set a benchmark so high that I refuse to let go of these standards.

In this relationship I was exposed to a love so pure that I never had to feel as though I was not good enough, as though I had to be a certain someone, carry a certain title or even look or speak a certain way to be accepted and loved perfectly. I was taken as I am, nothing was subtracted from my being but instead so much more good was added. #1 Love should not take from you but instead it should add onto and better what you already have.

In this relationship it did not matter what or how many arguments we had but a day would never pass without us making peace and moving on. A previous argument was never brought into a new one, grudges were things we knew nothing of. An argument was never personal, the one was never shamed, criticized nor belittled in the process. #2 Love does not belittle or cause harm.

I was awakened to a love that didn't require fancy outings and gifts to be beautiful and exciting. When they happened they were great but they were not the core elements which made the relationship. Simple acts of kindness, respect, loyalty, complimentary utterances were what made us. #3 Love should be based on the Subject and not the Objects.

Often most females desire this quality in their partners but only a few receive it. Close attention to detail. You want your partner to know and understand every facet of you. Strange enough I didn't go looking for this quality but received so much of it. Little things like the changed color of my lipstick I'd get told, "Something is different, did you change your lipstick?" and bingo! "You smell different, did you change your perfume?" and bingo! Some females will change their hairstyles completely and their partners will not even notice. #4 Love is patient enough to know fully and understand its partakers/participants.

Without numbering any further, through this relationship I was awakened to the fact that true love does not diminish with time, true love is stronger today than what it was yesterday. True love is liberating and exciting. True love is not a burden but constantly seeks to serve and appreciate. True love ages with the years and like wine it truly truly gets better and better. This kind of love does not seek to cheat, it is not interested in such time wasting, heart wrenching frivolities. True love is single-eyed and one-minded.

True love is TIMELESS... If you have not found this kind of love, trust me, it is worth waiting for!

Annual Remembrance Of My Existence

Reflection & Appreciation

Once a year every year, we all unavoidably get reminded of the day we were born and often this day is met with great enthusiasm as well as tons of expectations from ourselves to those around us. We expect to be celebrated and showered with messages, calls, gifts etc. at times we go as far as expect surprise getaways and parties or even plan our own.

While there is nothing wrong with this and being celebrated, have you taken the time to celebrate yourself? I mean taken the time to do some deep, honest and truthful introspection? To awe at the milestones you have overcome and conquered? The person you have become today?

While it's purely human to have expectations this can often lead to many disappointments, disappointments which might even be hard to fathom because, hello! it's my birthday, how could so and so not do such and such???? But then I say, why should so and so do such and such when you haven't done it for yourself when you actually can? I'm sure you get my point.

While it's okay to get celebrated, it is far more important to celebrate yourself!! The world will more fully celebrate a self-celebrated monument.

Self-Celebrated Monument

The beauty of being a self celebrated monument is that you are able to celebrate others even when it isn't their day or any special occasion.

This year particularly, I don't know why, maybe I'm growing up?? But I felt a deep sense of gratitude towards my parents, particularly my mom, the main reason that I am here today and celebrated. Had it not been for them, there would be nothing for those around me to celebrate today. Had it not been for my mom, her role and teachings, I would not be who and where I am today.

She is a self-celebrated monument that has celebrated me all the years of her life and my life will live on to celebrate hers all the days of my life.

New Year, New Leap, New Leaf

My annual remembrances serve as anniversaries which drive me to turning new leafs and planning new leaps. It is a time for me to reflect over all I have overcome and achieved in the past year and a time for me to plan and set out my pinnacles for the year to come.

As the years add on, I like to view myself as a barrel bearing precious goods, a barrel which should only bear fruitful gifts when the time has come and obviously this can only be achieved if I add good elements to this barrel. 

It is my journey and not a race, it is my path to take and my lessons to learn. I came alone and alone shall I return. I am celebrated because I have celebrated myself..

I am a Self-Celebrated Monument